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Hey Susan! Sooooo-zaaaaaan... Hello-oooo? ... Oh god, she's doing it again. Hey, new guy! Quick, grab a scarf, a trenchcoat, a notepad, a pen, a fedora, and a rubber chicken. Just do it! Less sauce more doing what I say! What? They're in the first-aid closet, duh! ... [sigh] It's gonna be a looong lunch hour.
ReplyDelete"Hey Janet - Charles says he put a "surprise" in someone's lunch today..."
ReplyDeleteDoes Shannen actually think that eating her lunch like someone with OCD will distract us from noticing that she totally cut her own bangs with scotch tape across her forehead? You know what someone with OCD would have done? Cut that shit straight.
ReplyDeleteSee? I told you scanners have to eat too.
ReplyDeleteAnd here we have the first Robo-Bitch 3000. Even though she's doing a remedial task like eating lunch, you can still see the bitch pouring through her eyes, and her boobs.. that's why you'll notice the blurryness if you look directly at them. What's that?? Yes, the food she consumes is not destroyed but converted into ice cream which she poops out, pre-coned.
ReplyDeleteOh goddammit Jane, were you in the bathroom last? I can always tell when it's you... Learn to use the friggin' air freshener!!
ReplyDeleteHey Sarah, you gonna eat that sandwich or just fucking stare straight ahead all day? (whispers: What a weirdo! She hasn't moved in four hours!)
ReplyDelete